How to Find Yourself, The True Self

“The freedom to be yourself is a gift only you can give yourself . . .”

Doe Zantamata

The quest to find out who you are is really up to you—no one else. Nobody can go on that journey for you. Your family and friends can only be there to support you at various points in life. Now, get ready to be put on the right path to finding yourself, the true self.

This guide contains tips about learning how to find yourself spiritually, followed by 6 questions that should be asked when finding one’s self. Some frequently asked questions (FAQs) have also been answered for your benefit.

Finding Yourself

As we age, there are personal changes that start to take place. This goes beyond the way our bodies transform. Your inner self will also experience changes in areas such as your beliefs, mindset, interests, political views, etc.

Some people end up putting themselves on autopilot without making a long-term plan, or find lasting fulfillment in their lives. This situation can be really addictive, but it is a false sense of contentment.

At a certain point, you will crave long-lasting satisfaction in your soul, and peace of mind that no one can give you. This is where the importance of finding one’s self comes in. It is necessary to find ourselves in order to avoid moving towards the wrong direction.

5 Ways on How to Find Yourself Spiritually

It is important to discover your spiritual side before you start finding your true self. This is because your spiritual path directly influences the decisions you make in life. It can be any system of faith, worship, belief, or devotion. Below are 6 easy ways on how to find yourself spiritually:

  1. Establish your quiet times
  2. Understand your current personality
  3. Know your passion
  4. Request Feedback
  5. Evaluate the important relationships in your life

1. Establish Your Quiet Times

Since you need to build spiritual connections before you can start finding yourself, then you have to do everything possible to establish a daily quiet period to aid spirituality. You cannot engage in spiritual practices effectively when there are distractions around you.

The best conditions involve a calm ambiance for prayers, meditation, studying religious texts, chanting, etc. You can try the Yoga Download which is helpful for such quiet times.

2. Understand Your Current Personality

You should know your character (moral and mental disposition) before finding yourself spiritually. This will determine how you will begin the process of discovering who you are. If you do not have a strong resolve to change for the better or improve your character, the foundation of the process will be weak. Determination and discipline are keys.

3. Know Your Passion

It is not possible to find ourselves without knowing what our ultimate interests are. Your passion will be the motivating factor that drives you to learn how to find your inner self. For example, it can be about learning, self-improvement, helping others, taking charge of your life, hobbies, having adventures, etc. Once you know how to find your inner self, you can start working on fulfilling your dreams.

4. Request Feedback

You can also meet with people that are practicing the same spiritual system or religion as you. It will be a good idea to learn how to find yourself under the guidance of spiritual practitioners/leaders. This may include attending spiritual (religious) meetings with other followers. You should ask this category of people to assess your progress from time to time.

5. Evaluate the Important Relationships in Your Life

There is a need to balance spirituality with our social lives in order to find ourselves faster. If some relationships are adversely affecting your spirituality or the mission to find out who you are, then you will need to work out a solution. Your best bet may be to take the bold step to end those relationships.

6 Questions to Reveal Your Life Purpose

In finding your true self, there are certain questions that can put you on the right path to discovering who you are. When you find answers to them, there will be more clarity as to the direction to take. See the 6 questions below.

  1. Which of my childhood experiences are the most memorable?
  2. Who is my role model and why did I choose him/her?
  3. What are my personal values?
  4. What are the causes I believe in fighting for?
  5. What are the personal goals I should set?
  6. What legacy do I want to leave behind after passing on?

It will be a good idea to understand how these questions are relevant to finding one’s self. Brief explanations have been given below.

1. Which of My Childhood Experiences Are the Most Memorable?

Memories of your childhood should mostly be about happy times. Such memories can inspire you to have a particular passion because your life purpose should be something that gives you happiness.

2. Who Is My Role Model and why Did I Choose Him/Her?

What does it mean to find yourself, while having a role model that you look up to? It means that there are similarities in passion with the person, and you are motivated by his/her success. Still, how do you know who you are while having a role model? Simply emulate their only important positive traits, rather than copying everything about them. Be yourself. Have a mind of your own and strive for uniqueness!

3. What Are My Personal Values?

Tell yourself this: My personal values reflect my true self. Therefore, my true self should not be flexible… Those two lines will make you feel just how important it is to protect your personal values. If you keep going against them, then you will experience setbacks in determining your life purpose.

4. What Are the Causes I Believe in Fighting for?

Activism may become a passion of yours after discovering who you are—depending on the path of enlightenment taken.

5. What Are the Personal Goals I Should Set?

This question should come to mind when you find yourself. Personal goals should be based on one’s dreams in order to stay on the right track.

6. What Legacy Do I Want to Leave after Passing on?

Ask yourself this question: How can I make a lasting impact on the lives of others and future generations? This may become a very important question in middle age. The earlier, the better.

Watch this YouTube video to learn more about how to find yourself:

How To Discover Your Life Purpose

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What Does It Mean to Find Yourself?

The process of finding one’s self can take a very long time. It can take years or even decades. This is why you may not even be sure about the success of your mission when it finally ends. So, how can you be sure? It will definitely mean that you have finally taken charge of your life, and there is a real sense of contentment with your current status.

At what Age Do You Find Yourself?

There is no definite age to start finding one’s self. Even kids can start as early as possible. With these facts in mind, you should know that there is no universally accepted target age to achieve this. Based on his observation, an author on Quora was of the opinion that most people never achieve self-discovery until they are past their mid-50s.

How Do I Find My Sense of Self?

In other words, how do you know who you are? You can do this by first embracing spirituality. This will have a positive influence on your physical life. From there, the path will get clearer until you achieve a concrete sense of identity.

How to find yourself spiritually?

This can be answered a thousand ways depending on what spirituality means to you. To me spirituality feels like connection or like being one with something bigger than yourself, whether that is music, nature, sunsets or animals. 

You can also answer this question in terms of love, in which case you are searching to be one with another person in love. The problem, we, as a society have is we get caught up in the material and we forget the spiritual and love connection that a lot of us seek.

That is up to you. For example, you can follow your own religion, or you could follow science and reason. The main thing to make sure is that you do so carefully and that you understand everything you believe in. You only truly find yourself when you do things based on knowledge and reason and not off of others’ experiences or the designations of yourself given to you by others.

You should never follow something just based on others’ experiences or explanations given to you, but you need to see them for yourself. You should not allow others to control what you do. People tend to do things before they think. You need to learn how to think and you need to do so before acting on anything.

The life is a journey of finding oneself spiritually. Do not sit on the fence. No person who does not have a definite purpose in his life can be spiritually healthy, for he will not have the inner strength and perseverance to overcome the inevitable difficulties.

Is It OK to not Know what You Want in Life?

Yes, it is. You can always try to know at other times in the future. Be patient and continue developing yourself.

How Do I Know what I Want in Life?

You will know after considering what your passion, interests, successes, and ambitions are. Knowing who your role model is (if any) might be helpful.

What Does It Mean to not Know Yourself?

When you are in this situation, it will seem as if life is always tiring and overwhelming. You will never truly be satisfied with your successes. This is what will push you to learn how to find yourself.


Finding one’s self involves asking yourself all the relevant questions, and getting reasonable answers. The answers are what will lead you further till you find out who you are. It is why this guide contains many questions. Even your ultimate goal is an answer to the question: What is my true self?

As stated earlier in the quote by Doe Zantamata, it is mostly up to you to learn how to find your inner self. Your resolve is what will determine the success of this quest. Still, you can seek the help of other people (family, friends, and/or counsellors) at certain points on your journey to self-discovery.

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Kalpataru Biswas

Kalpataru Biswas is a writer with a focus on business and career-related subjects. He has been writing for various websites since 2018 and has more than ten years of experience in driving revenue through data-driven Sales & Marketing.

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