You may have thought of it, how to let go of anger? How to forgive someone? It is surprising that even today, not everyone has learned how to forgive and move forward. Not only that but also people find many difficult questions in forgiveness like how to forgive someone you love? How to forgive someone you hate? How does one learn to forgive? And many more similar questions.
Anger is a very dangerous poison. Not only to the people around you but also to yourself. It may cause you to lash out at people, ruin your concentration, and make living a lot much harder. It is not to suppress anger, as emotions are normal, however, it is more important to move forward. Moving forward closes the painful doors of the past and opens new doors to a better tomorrow.
Here, we’ll give you some actionable tips on how to forgive, and on how to let go of anger. Though the two are interconnected, they require their own unique ways to handle.
On How to Forgive Someone
Forgiveness is often defined as the intention and deliberate choice to release anger or vengeance against someone who has hurt you. Learning to forgive will allow you to sustain a healthy life and keep on moving forward.
Keep in mind a couple of things on how to forgive:
- Forgiveness does not always mean reconciliation. Just because you forgive someone does not mean you have to open your relationship to them. In fact, you can forgive and still refuse to see each other.
- Forgiveness does not mean seeing the person who hurt you in a positive light, nor does it mean excusing their wrongdoings.
- Forgiveness is a choice. Pain and resentment do not go away on their own – and you can’t feel when to forgive. To forgive requires strength of will.
- You do not have to forgive someone immediately. Sometimes it is important to distance yourself and take some time off.
Many people ask, today, how do you forgive? It is the result of positive thinking to live a healthy life.
Here are some actionable tips on forgiving:
- One may ask, how to forgive someone you love? Forgiving someone you love does not mean remembering only the parts you love about a person. Rather, it’s accepting the person for their entirety. Do no excuse them for mistakes – make them learn and tell them why it hurt. Teaching them is done out of love.
- One of the important steps is choosing to move on. If you obsess over the pain, you will never move on and be stuck in a painful cycle. To forgive means to let the pain go by and choose to be present at the moment.
- Although other people may have been responsible for your pain, you must take responsibility for your own wellbeing. Forgiveness is not other’s responsibility, rather it is yours.
- Choose to be kind, every time. Whether it is someone you love who hurt you or someone you hate, you must choose to be kind. By living a life of kindness, forgiveness comes much more naturally to you.
How to Let Go of Anger
Whether it’s a long-term resentment, or anger recently kindled – anger can escalate to dangerous levels. It is important to let go of your anger before your anger takes over. Here are some things to keep in mind about anger, and possible ways to let go of it:
- If the anger is sparked by something immediate – whether traffic, a line, or an annoying coworker – simply take deep breaths. Take deep breaths – making sure to take it nice and slow. If you can, do this in a quiet spot to better help you.
- Letting go of anger does not mean you should lash out at someone. However, you may still try and vent to your friends – speaking about your frustrations can absolutely help. Explaining your anger to someone else may help you find clarity – and make letting go of anger much easier.
- One way on how to let go of anger is through humor. Turning a bad situation into a joke can make defuse not only you but the tension around everyone else.
- Remember that anger is a very strong emotion – and can change how you see the world. So when you are feeling angry, ask yourself, am I seeing the truth, or am I seeing what my anger sees? By being constantly mindful of your anger, you can better control yourself.
- Not all anger is bad. Anger against injustices, oppression, and similar things is well needed. Anger can be a good motivator and can be useful when used properly. If your anger however is directed towards revenge – this anger is dangerous. Be mindful of the type of anger you feel.
- If you feel you cannot control your anger anymore – try and find a way to change your surroundings. By doing this, you are less likely to lose control of yourself. If you are unable to do this, try and see if you can head to the restroom so you can wash your face with cool water. This can help cool you down.
Yoga & Meditation for Learning to Forgive
One of the oldest approaches and practices for finding peace would be through yoga and meditation. Meditation and yoga have been around for thousands of years – and have spread amongst many cultures worldwide. It has been the main way of finding peace and strengthening the mind in many cultures.
By practicing yoga and meditation, you will receive many benefits. From improved flexibility and ease of pain to better energy and mood – yoga and meditation are the healthiest habits you can practice right now!
Yoga and meditation will be the key to letting go of anger, as well as learning to forgive. Because of the pandemic, it may be difficult to go to any nearby yoga clubs. Thankfully, everyone can begin practicing yoga and meditation at home through the internet!
One of the best sources for yoga would be yogadownload.com. It is a website that aims to provide you easy access to many yoga programs, instructors, and more! For a membership as low as $10 a month, you will have access to hundreds of yoga classes and downloads for you to enjoy! So if you would like to begin your yoga and meditation journey – you can start with yogadownload.com!
10 Tips on Letting Go of Anger
1. Identify your source of anger
Anger is difficult to let go of when you are not sure where your anger comes from. Taking the time to reflect and ask yourself “What is making me angry?” will be the first step in freeing yourself from anger. Is it the morning traffic? Is it some unresolved conflict you have with a friend or spouse?
2. Get some regular exercise
Getting some regular exercise or any physically strenuous activity is very helpful when letting go of anger. It keeps your mind occupied, and apart from this getting regular exercise has also been said to improve mental health (Alexandratos et al. 2012).
3. Write your anger on paper
One excellent way on how to let go of anger would be through writing your thoughts down. Writing your thoughts down can help you understand your frustrations better. Furthermore, by writing it down, you free the anger from your mind and put it onto paper. Studies have shown that writing down your emotions can help significantly lower frustrations and stress (Suhr et al. 2017).
4. Avoid your source of anger (for awhile)
People think immediately dealing with the source of anger is the way to go. However people sometimes fail, and as a result always ask how do you forgive? Even when it’s their spouse they struggle, and people ask how to forgive someone you love? Before moving straight to forgiveness, it is good to get away from this person and get some space for yourself.
5. Acknowledge your anger
Anger is difficult and impossible to resolve if you constantly pretend it is not there. By accepting that you are angry, you have taken the first step to resolve it. By denying that you are angry, it will last much longer than it should – and you will be prone to terrible outbursts.
6. Take responsibility for your anger
Anger is difficult to let go of when you are not sure where your anger comes from. Taking the time to reflect and ask yourself “What is making me angry?” will be the first step in freeing yourself from anger. Is it the morning traffic? Is it some unresolved conflict you have with a friend or spouse? By identifying its source – you can hopefully
7. Practice Mindfulness
Being aware of your anger and choosing to focus on the moment will help you let go of anger. By choosing to focus on the moment, you are learning to remove the power of anger in your life. There are many ways to practice mindfulness, whether through meditation or even through yoga.
8. Practice Gratitude
One can uplift their mood and forget to help let go of anger by practicing gratitude. Take some time each day to count each blessing and be thankful for it. By remembering the blessings you have, you realize how small and trivial your anger is. As a result, anger becomes easier to let go.
9. Make solutions
One of the best ways to resolve anger is to deal with the problem that caused it in the first place. When you have settled and are in better control of your anger, the next step is to find solutions. Is there something I can do now to help mend the problem? Is there some way I can help myself so the anger does not happen again? It is good to change and take control of what you can to help you let go of anger.
10. Practice Forgiveness
Ultimately, the key to letting go of anger completely is through forgiveness. By choosing to forgive the person who hurt you, you free yourself from anger. It may be hard in the beginning, but forgiveness is like a muscle – the more you practice the easier it becomes.
Is yoga a form of meditation?
Yoga refers to a set of physical, mental, and spiritual practices. Yoga is not a form of meditation, but rather meditation is a part of yoga!
What is the benefit of Yoga and meditation?
Yoga alongside meditation has various benefits for its practitioners. For one, yoga can help ease body pain, and also bring alongside it better moods and energy. With this inner peace, yoga can also allow you to forgive and let go of anger much easier!
Can you truly forgive someone?
Everyone can be forgiven, however, not everyone can be reconciled with. A victim can forgive someone who has hurt them but does not need to reconcile or open a relationship with the person. Forgiveness has to occur so people can move on with their own lives.
How do I let go of unresolved anger?
If you are sure of the anger’s source, or if it has been with you for a long time, one of the best ways is to go get professional help. Therapists can teach one how to let go of anger, as well as teach you how to forgive just so you can move forward with your life.
What emotion is behind anger?
Anger is a response to stress. To be more specific, anger is a common response towards pain – especially when one feels loss or is threatened. One can be angry because of something bad done to them, or someone can feel anger towards injustices done to others.
I hope you all choose to become more forgiving and kinder people. Make a fresh start – and so choose to let go of past pain and instead make a new life. Rather than open new wounds, choose to nurture kindness and better relationships. By practicing forgiveness and kindness – we can create a much more peaceful world.
Alexandratos, Kristy, et al. “The Impact of Exercise on the Mental Health and Quality of Life of People with Severe Mental Illness: A Critical Review.” British Journal of Occupational Therapy, vol. 75, Feb. 2012, pp. 48–60, doi:10.4276/030802212X13286281650956.
Dyer, Wayne. “How To Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You: In 15 Steps”. Wayne’s Blog. Available from: https://www.drwaynedyer.com/blog/how-to-forgive-someone-in-15-steps/
John Hopkins Medicine. “9 benefits of Yoga”. Available from: https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/9-benefits-of-yoga
Suhr, M., et al. “Maintaining Mental Health Through Positive Writing: Effects of a Resource Diary on Depression and Emotion Regulation: Resource Diary Stabilizing Mental Health.” Journal of Clinical Psychology, vol. 73, Feb. 2017, doi:10.1002/jclp.22463.